All Hallows Eve

Halloween and I don't always do much of anything.  Usually it stems from the fact that I don't have an invite to do something.  Sometimes because I don't have a creative idea and sometimes because I just can't be bothered to dress up.  So this year was a bit different.  I had reason, cause and an idea.  I know right.. so Friday after work I ventured... bravely to the garment district and picked up a few things for a party on Saturday.  I was pretty successful in my shopping and the bonus being I can theoretically wear it ALL again.  Woot Woot.  cause effective costumes. 

So what pray tell was I.  Well like a dumbo I didn't take a picture.  But I went as


Yes I went as Sheldon coopers girl friend.  Otherwise known as Amy Farrah Fowler.  And people actually got it.  A costume success. 

But lets just say I'm not as young as I used to be, so off to bed...its 10:04..  I've got to hurry

Fear

I've been pretty into trying new things lately. Or I guess the opportunity to try new things has really been plopped in front of me in a few instances. It made me realize how much I actually liked, well in this case, nature and the woods. And made me start to think... Why don't I do this more often? 

I always thought it was because I was lazy. Going into nature seemed fall into the category of "things I never get around to". So naturally I just figured I'm too lazy to go. 

It was brought to my attention that laziness isn't really a thing. I mean think about it, what stops us from doing things we want to do... Laziness to put it in physics terms is when two opposing forces hit each other, causing the object not to move. If you take equal parts excitement and anxiety you aren't going to get much done. 

When that was told to me, it made me realize "ok, so what is stopping me... Why am I afraid or anxious" 

In the case of out doors stuff it mainly has to do with lack of knowledge. I don't know what I'm doing or how to be particularly safe so I'mless inclined    to  be super adventurous, if for no other reason then I like my limbs intact. I also still consider myself a bit of clutz. I have hurt myself doing really stupid stuff before so I know it's a possibility. 

So what first step did I take to getting out of the way of the fear.  I bought a hiking guide book. Yes one of those travel books. But at least using that I can get an idea of what I'm walking in to before I do. And then I can be at the very least mentally prepared. 

Knowledge is power and that will help aliviate the fear 

Weekend of fun ness

This weekend was really fun, and somewhat typical for me.  I always have plans or things planned out, and then other things transpire, and it is all good. 

Friday night 18oct13 - yoga night as usual. The assisting was rejuvenating as always, especially since Abby and I had not been united in a few weeks. I love assisting cause it just makes me feel good. Giving some loving to some people, completely perfect for a friday. 

My post class practice with Sarah was Great as well. And we decided to change things up and go to life alive for dinner. I ended up staying at the restaurant cause my buddy Kate was there so the night ended with nice Convo.

Saturdays 19oct13

This weekend was the head of the Charles regatta so I wanted to make sure to get my butt to the water to watch alittle. I always like watching but this year was fun since I have a bit of an understanding of what makes the boat go :) it also helped that the weather was awesome. Laurel met me down in Harvard sq. 

After a bit I had to boogie to acupunture and laundry for the afternoon. And the day ended making a delicious dinner and good company. 

Sunday 20oct13

The day started with a great brunch at Kelly's dinner in Somerville. If you haven't been there... Go, that's all I'm saying just go. You won't be disappointed. 

Then it was off to the east Cambridge rib fest. Which was also delicious. It's basically a street fair in east Cambridge where you can try different ribs from places. There were many good ones and there will definitely be some further culinary trials in my future. 

Once that was over I needed to move so I thought it would be fun to check out the fells. Which is near my house. I did a short hike in the fells, though I got a little annoyed cause I kept running into the road. Noooo! The whole point was to be in  nature. And as you can tell it was beautiful. 

That time I went to the loj

This weekend I had a very interesting experience. I went camping... For the first time in about 3 years. It actually may have been longer, basically I can't remember. 

The weekend started with a half day Friday. Which was great. I mean who doesn't love getting away early on Friday.  I boogied home and had some lunch and grabbed my large and in charge pack.  Technically speaking the pack is Ricky's but it was good to have one. It's amazing  how quickly it got heavy. 

The drive was relatively uneventful. I stopped twice, mainly to have a break... And make a grocery run, since I was instructed to bring mead up... Turns out mead is tasty.  Anyway, 4 hrs in the car and I was there. 

That's when the fun really began. I knew I had to park my car and walk about half a mile to get to the loj. So I loaded up and away I went. 

It was pretty quiet when I got there. Only 3 other people. They were playing lord of the rings risk. It was fun to watch. Otherwise there was a lot of hanging, a fire building "contest" and a game of monopoly.  While waiting for the masses to show up... Which there were a lot of. 

This is the sunset off the back deck on Friday... Holy crap right!

The sleeping pad was surprisingly comfortable, or maybe I just set my expectations super low so I was happy. And we were enough away from the clanging that the morning was not jarring. Apparently getting hung over college kids out of a tent involves a pot and wooden spoon, a la lets scare away the bears... Who knew.

Anyway. We ended up being a bit slow. Largely cause the boys were going climbing and therefore did not need to be up at a certain time. I on the other hand almost missed my chance to go hiking. I went with a small group that was leaving straight from the loj. It was a tough hike. But we took the shelbourne trail.. And were going to summit (something) but I sort of died a bit so I didn't quite make it. Instead I bundled up in a fork in the road. Read my book and waiting for the group to start back tracking.

Little did I know at the time... The rest of the group had a a different plan. When they got back it was decided to bush wack to Howe peak... Which was and a quote "oh just 1.5 miles straight east " keep in mind... From where we were standing straight east was trees... No trail no nothing.   I maned up and went and actual it was kind of fun... Minus the head scraps.  

Of course we got to the top and it was so cloudy that it looked night like.

The sort of funny thing was we beat the other group that was going up Howe peak. But they were bush wacking I think the whole way, they got back a good 2 hrs after me. 

Once we summited we headed back to hopefully make it back by 7pm. Ill say this now, I was the slow one. Thank god we had two guides cause one stayed with me while the other went with the 3 very practiced hiker girls in my group.  The way down was relatively uneventful except for missing the last turn off and having to walk and extra 2 miles around the highway :(  

The rest of the evening relatively relaxing. I sort of waited around for the boys. Then we ate, drank and were merry. Went to sleep very sore but happy. 

Sunday (13oct13) I knew would likely be a lazy get up relaxing, eat and leave situation and it was. I departed and the boys went repelling... Which would have been fun, but there is always next time. All in all.  Excellent weekend. 

The other new thing

I realized I didn't mention my other new thing this year. Rowing! 

Try new stuff

So trying new stuff is always a bit scary. So it's nice when you get that little external push / support to do something that you would otherwise just think about doing. 

What pray tell have I been doing? I have been rock climbing. More specifically I went bouldering once and top rope climbing once. The main difference, bouldering is done without rope, so the wall is Way! Shorter. I bet there are other distinctions too, that I will learn at some point.  

But the really cool thing about it is this is now the second thing that I've tried this year that I've really liked. It has also made me more aware of one of the major benefits of crossfit. You feel like a bad ass in other avenues.  I mean I don't think if I wasn't doing crossfit I would feel really as physically adept at things.  

Even though the first time was scary. I realized quickly that I could actually get myself up the easy routes. Obviously to have no technique and that may come later... If I stick with it. Now I'm mainly enjoying the novelty of the newness:)

Scrubby scrubby

I like to think I'm a pretty good cook, when I have the time that is. I can come up that usually tastes pretty good and is mildly creative. The quick and dirty cooking doesn't really count since its largely to do with functionality. 

(Thawed chicken... Must cook... Sort of variety) 

But when I have time I like to play in the kitchen. ( have to share that I just wrote chicken instead)  anyway. 

The thing I've lately noticed is I'm scorching things to the bottom of my cook wear. Mega annoying and mega annoying. I don't even do it on purpose. Or I guess no one does but it makes me feel spacey.  

Oh well.... Lot on my mind. I think yes. 

I am enough

I've been doing a lot of thinking about how I approach life and the fact that I am the supreme undervaluer of myself. I don't really believe in the whole law of attraction, but there is something to think of when you completely know you underestimate yourself. 

The question of course comes with how do you fix it, or change something that is completely internal to yourself. 

The first thing I've been doing has been instituting this new mantra. " I am enough" especially during my yoga practice, which is really one of the few times I can be truly in tune with my internal being. This mantra was actually given to me by a fellow yogi and I don't think she even knows. It's so beautifully simple that it really perfect. And that is really why I like yoga. I mean I think lots of people would agree that the first step to any change is to accept the truth about wherever your starting point is. I mean how can I change something if I don't admit where the "start" is. Be it behaviorally, cognitively or social.,. And really I think about all of them. But I need to stop thinking seventeen steps ahead and realize even if I want to change something the first thing I need to do is accept myself.

I am enough...I am enough... I am enough