Some days I wake up feeling good, some days not. I think in general feeling strong has a powerful effect on me, and especially in dealing with cancer. I mean its one time where your body feels like your enemy so proving that you are still in control feels really really good.
Today was a good example of that. I payed a visit to Crossfit Boston and did a work out. It was modified of course, and lower weight of course, but it felt so good to feel strong. To pick up the bar bell and actually snatch, to feel the burn of burpees even. You know I've reached a different level of things when I feel that burpees are a good thing. It was a challenge but I still managed to do 10 in a row a few times and that felt awesome. This whole cancer thing has been an exercise in meeting my body where it is. I mean I have to and I know that, but the inner pusher in me doesn't want to. I want to push just a little more, most of the time. Especially in a crossfit sort of situation. I want to keep up with everyone as best I can, not so much that I hurt myself but pushing to the limits. And lets be honest, that can't happen right now... it just can't. So doing this workout felt really good because I did my thing and was able to get some movement and strength in. And that is important. I remembered how good it feels to move and actually be sore in a strength way, and that is something that reminds me that I am a BAD ASS and can take on anything.